Funny NY Speeding Ticket Excuses


  •  An officer pulled over a grandma and asked why she was in a hurry.  The grandma responded that she had ice cream in the back and did not want it to melt.  The police let her go.
  •  A car packed with four ladies excited for a day of shopping was cruising down the New York Thruway near Syracuse when a police officer pulled them over.  When asked, “Do you know how fast you were going?” The driver answered, “No, officer, I don’t. But I’m sure I was moving right along because I was just trying to keep up with my mouth.”  It worked because no speeding ticket was issued.
  •  A woman was daydreaming while driving and must have been speeding because a police officer pulled her over.  Her husband, who was a cop, told her that he always let people off without a ticket if they had a real original excuse.  When the state trooper reached the car, he informed her that she was speeding.  The lady driver looked the police officer and said firmly: “Do you have any idea what I did to the last cop who stopped me for speeding?” The officer looked startled.  The driver continued, “I married him.” While walking away and in the middle of laughing, the police officer said to slow down and have a nice day.
  •  Another driver was pulled over by a state trooper and when he told her that she was speeding.  She answered, “I was talking to myself because I am mad at my husband and was practicing what I was going to say to him.  I guess the madder I got, the faster I drove.”  The state trooper closed his ticket book and walked away.
  •  A married couple had been trying to have a child for a long time.  While racing to see a specialist at a hospital, they were pulled over for driving 94 mph in a 25-mph zone.  Only three minutes from the hospital, the couple informed the cop of the situation and explained that it was urgent to get their “sample” to the fertility specialist immediately.
  •  While racing down the New York Thruway near Schenectady, a couple was stopped by a NY State trooper for speeding.  The lady who was in her ninth month of pregnancy began huffing and puffing as if she was in labor.  The husband respectfully invited the trooper to look at his wife who appeared as if she was going to deliver immediately in the car.  The trooper let them go with a warning to drive carefully on the way to the hospital.
  •  This excuse worked in Boone County, Missouri so it might not work up north in Yonkers, New York: Auntie was clocked doing 80 mph in a 45 mph, and she excused herself by declaring that she was frying chicken and had left the frying pan on the fire.
  •  A funeral director was taking an unembalmed body to be cremated at an out of town crematory.  A state trooper pulled him over for driving 90 mph.  The driver told the trooper that if he does not reach the crematory in an hour it would close for the weekend.  The driver claimed, “If you don’t believe me, take a whiff.”  The trooper actually stuck his head through the side window, jerked it out and told the driver to hurry along and be careful.
  •  A police officer explained that one night he clocked a going 82 in a 45-mile zone. Upon approaching the car, the driver said, “I know why you stopped me and I know I deserve a ticket, but I really need to go”.  The driver continued to explain that he just ate at McDonalds and he got a severe case of diarrhea. Having been sick himself, the police officer let him go.
  •  A driver pulled over for speeding once said to the police officer that he was speeding in order to catch up to the car in front of him to read his license plate because the other car threw a beer bottle at his car.

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